Recalling significant "firsts" from my early years











Our local radio personality and newspaper columnist Bob Sanders writes funny reflections of his growing up years in northwest Alabama. A recent column recalled all the "firsts" of his early years, such as his first train ride, his first movie show, his first hamburger and hotdog, etc. I was prompted to recall some of my firsts. Now I am not nearly as good on early recollections as some folks. My memory is just plain fuzzy about much of my childhood. However, I do recall a few firsts.






Some of my memories are easily recalled because they were so embarrassing. I recall my first hamburger for that reason. I should point out that we NEVER went out to a cafe or restaurant for food. That practice became common much later in my life. A small cafe near my home had the best-smelling hamburgers in the world--well, in my small world, at least. I remember going there after somehow accumulating the necessary money for a hamburger and coke. (Note: in my world, ALL soft drinks were called coke. That was the generic term. Coca-Cola (pronounced co-coler) was the specific, but there was also RC, Grapico, etc.) The waitress asked what I wanted and I said " a hamburger and a coke". She then said "all the way?" I stared blankly, so she said again "all the way?" I continued to stare blankly, I suppose, or maybe said "huh" as I had no idea what she meant. Finally, the cook said "do you want onions, pickles, lettuce and tomato?" I said "O.K., I guess". I was very embarrassed to be so ignorant, but the hamburger was wonderful. After that, I always ordered a hamburger--all the way. Hamburgers have remained a favorite of mine. I plan to cook one for our supper tonight!







Gaither Driver's cafe was downtown. I remember going there a few times as a teenager for a hamburger. The aroma may have been even better as his cafe was bigger and much busier. It was sort of a hangout for all sorts of folks. I remember one of my buddies, Tubby, asking my future sister-in-law, Shelby, if she worked as a waitress at Gaither's. She very indignantly answered no! Tubby knew she had a familiar face and was just trying to place her, but he made the wrong guess. Some of the girls who worked at Gaithers were probably not the "take home to momma" type.






I remember several other firsts, some of which I have chronicled in an earlier writing, such as my first hunting kill, my first drive in a car, and my first sweetheart. My first real big snow was a doozie. It set some records for snow in north Alabama and was quite a sight for a six year old. I don't know the exact depth, but it was enough to halt everything for a town with NO snow removal capability. We played in it, and ate snow ice cream, and then hoped it would finally melt.








My first time to eat pizza came later in life as a grown-up. I don't believe I had ever eaten pizza until I went into the Army (1953-1955). I did not know of a pizza place anywhere in the South of my time. The cooks prepared pizza for some special occasion while I was at Ft. Sill, Oklahoma, and the Northern soldiers explained to the Southern soldiers just what this strange looking stuff was! I don't think pizza became very common in the South until much later. There was only one place I can recall that served pizza when I moved to Huntsville in 1959. I do remember that I liked it, but that may have been because it was such a novelty.






Of course, the military introduces you to many things for the first time. There is the famous "creamed beef on toast." The GIs lovingly refer to it as "s--t on a shingle!" My cousin Wayne Ledbetter said it was common in the Navy as well, so I am sure it was common in all armed services. I actually loved it, and usually ate mine and someone else's each time it was served. I guess that says something about my growing-up years and our diet. I learned to eat what we had and appreciate it. I thought the military mess was very good food, but most guys grumbled a lot about the food.









I remember my first train ride with far less joy than Bob Sanders recalled his. I had been working in Detroit, and was on my way home to enter the Army. The guy I was driving home with attempted to pass a big semi just as the semi decided to turn without bothering to signal. We had a very bad collision and I was truly hurting all over. His car was totaled, so we caught a train in Cincinnati and rode to Attalla, Alabama. That was a long and painful journey. I hurt with every shake and rattle of the train and it shook and rattled the entire time.







My first attempt at chewing tobacco was also memorable. It is amazing to reflect back on the use of tobacco in my childhood. Practically everyone either smoked, dipped, or chewed tobacco. My dad chewed Brown Mule tobacco. I cannot imagine how the advertising people thought that was a good name for a product, but I am fairly certain my memory is correct. Anyway, I took a plug of his tobacco out in the woods, sat down under a big tree in my favorite spot, took a big "chaw" and began to chew away. Of course, some--probably a lot--of the juice managed to be swallowed, although I was spitting like crazy. I became sick very quickly, and started for home. By the time I got there, I was really sick. My mom saw me coming, saw my wobbly gait, and my (probably green) face, and she became very alarmed. She asked what happened, and I think I was able to tell her--not sure. I was not punished for that little episode. They rightly decided the tobacco had taken care of that! I never tried that again until I was bored once in the Army, and got about the same result. I have wondered over the years how anyone develops the habit of chewing tobacco, as they must get by that first few times of being really, really, sick.






I remember a first of eating at a very fancy restaurant. I had eaten at one or two fairly nice restaurants, but not with all the focus on the fancy. Days after ending my military service, and while waiting to enter college in the fall term, a friend talked me into selling "waterless"cookware. One of my bad decisions. We sold only to single girls, and it was just very over-priced and over-sold (I worked from a script in my sales pitch!) I only did it a short time, and while quite successful, it simply violated my view of right and wrong, so I quit. However, at the beginning, they took us to Birmingham to a sales meeting and really put on the dog. I had bought a new suit for the occasion. We were in a fine restaurant with white linens and white gloved waiters, etc. I remember being served a shrimp cocktail with the little fork and lemon slice attached. I just wasn't quite sure how I should eat those suckers! I felt like the Julia Roberts' character in "Pretty Woman". There were other dishes with similar "problems" for the uninitiated. I was very out of place there! I remember a very nice lady sitting nearby saw my discomfort and tried to offer help, somewhat like the Ralph Bellamy (older fellow) character offered Julia, but that only added to my embarrassment. Like I said, some of my memories of firsts have to do with the embarrassment I remember.







I don't believe we ever really had a steak, as sold in restaurants, in my early years. Beef was not commonly eaten at home, although we had ground beef or (the cheap pulverized steak--can't recall name) occasionally. Bob Sanders recalled a first of having meat loaf when he visited an aunt in Birmingham. I do recall Mom cooking meat loaf on occasion. My first recollection of having a real steak in a restaurant was at a football function while in high school, and I seem to remember it only because Neal Reed got some steak caught in his teeth and was trying to pry it out with his fork. That is a hard trick to pull off inconspicuously. We were all laughing at him, but it was driving him nuts, and the harder he worked at it, while trying to be somewhat discreet, the funnier it got. So much for my first steak. My first really memorable steak was in Atlanta on a football recruiting trip paid for by the Georgia Bulldogs. I have described that trip in an earlier writing. We didn't know how to order a steak, but had seen someone order it "rare" in a movie, so we ate our first nearly raw meat ever. Mom, and most moms in the South, cooked one way for all meat--very well done.







I have no recollection of my first movie, although we saw few in those early years. I have described my "novel" way of gaining entrance to the theatre and seeing movies with Bobby Burgess in an earlier writing. I do remember my first TV show. It was a pro football game and I was already out of high school. The image was very snowy as the signal was received by "rabbit ears" on the set. Neither we nor any of our friends owned a TV during my high school days. We listened to the radio a lot for music and sports events.

I remember my first dog well, and talked about him in my earlier writing. His life ended tragically, and I had blocked out much of that memory. I couldn't think of his name, but think now it may have been Buddy. That is not a first I like to recall. Kids get very attached to pets, and it is unfortunate that the pets are usually pretty vulnerable to illnesses and accidental deaths. That was especially true back then.







Well, my recollections of early firsts is not as interesting as I found Bob Sanders' list to be. Sorry! He has a remarkable memory, and noted lots of events in his early life. I have vague recollections of that period. It is interesting to recall how things have changed so much over my lifetime. I am sure that will be true for my children as well. Take good notes!

The process of aging, or, as time flies by!








I find the process of aging to be quite interesting, and even amusing at times. I don't think I noticed aging at all until I was well into middle age. Then, the results of aging become inescapable and very noticeable. I could no longer see as well, play as well, concentrate as well, sleep as well, etc. Really, I could not do anything as well! That is a shock, but it only gets worse with age, so you learn to adapt. Glasses help, but do not solve the probem of seeing well. Actually, none of the "fixes" get us back where we were; only better than without the "fix".





There are lots of fixes available today. Knee and hip joint replacement is among several fixes my friends have tried, and most with pleasing results. The joints simply wear out, and the pain reaches a point that joint replacement is a great relief. There was a time when the heart wore out and we just died. Now we have valve replacement, bypass surgery, and other techniques for the heart and other vital organs that extend life expectancy much farther than it was just a few years ago.





Of course, quality of life issues arise as we extend life expectancy. No one wants to simply live longer. We want to live a good quality of life for a longer period. Therein lies the rub, as they say. Marion and I visited several elderly friends at the nursing home recently, and as we were leaving we both agreed that a quick heart attack would be a blessing when we got that old!






It is interesting to reflect on get-togethers with friends today as opposed to a few years ago. We used to talk about what was going on in the world. Now we spend a lot of time talking about what is going on with us. Whereas before we rarely mentioned our little aches and pains, but rather were focused mostly on things external to ourselves; now we talk a lot about our various ailments; the symptoms and attempted cures, or the planned surgeries and already completed surgeries. Some are very conversant in medical language and terminology, exotic technical terms, the many and varied drugs, and of course, all the inside information on all of them. I did not learn much biology in school, and know very little today. Perhaps that is a blessing. Ignorance is bliss in this case. I know so little I don't worry much at all about medical matters.




All of this "aging thing" is really quite comical to me--at times. When we travel any distance and make a rest stop (read pee break. That, too, is one of the issues--many stops!) and I get out of the car, I can hardly walk, and cannot stand fully erect. I waddle along with an arched back like Tim Conway did long ago on the Carol Burnett show! At the time, I thought he was hilarious. I had no idea he was mocking me in a future time. I suppose it is just part of the aging process. I remember, as a child, overhearing my mother talk with her friends about their various ailments, and I found it amusing. Now I find it amusing in myself! Life is really a cycle that repeats itself with each generation. Get ready, you young folks!







I have tried to resist these trends, of course. Perhaps not nearly as hard as I should resist, however, as it seems to have had little effect. We are each on a path that moves relentlessly to its conclusion. It seems no amount of resisting really make much difference. A friend gave us a framed "saying" that has a lot of truth in it, "Old Age is Not for Sissies!" One of my dear friends, who I played football with in high school and briefly in college, had to miss our last high school class reunion. He played a full four years of college football, and his knees reflect the wear and tear. He had recently undergone hernia surgery as well as knee replacement surgery. He was further handicapped by his other knee, which was extremely painful, and he is awaiting surgery to replace it. He simply could not handle the travel and walking required to attend our reunion. We had a significant number of our surviving classsmates who could not attend the reunion for health reasons. Such is old age.







I am starting to sound morose. I will try to shift gears. I said growing old was amusing at times. Most of the jokes we tell at our get-togethers are around the subject of aging, and its effects. Some are hilarious, and we laugh harder at them than most other people probably would, as they ring so true for us! When we were planning our upcoming reunion, and deciding to meet more frequently, one classmate was pressing the point of urgency as classmates were dying at an increasing rate. He said "hey, at our age, we shouldn't even buy green bananas!" Well, it's not quite that bad, but we did decide to meet every year. We can see the writing on the wall. My son-in-law's dad sent me a very funny video today. It is a guy singing a song about memory loss and its impact on our lives. We laugh because the situations he describes are common to us all.

Of course aging has it's positive side as well. We no longer sweat the small things nearly as much. We get more philosophical with age, and simply realize that swatting at windmills is futile. That helps us survive political seasons, economic cycles, and even bad football seasons. Bad politicians come and go, their bad policies are soon replaced with other bad policies, all sports teams move in cycles, so we enjoy the upside--six in a row!--and roll with the down side. The economy runs in cycles and we are now heading toward ( or into) a downturn, but we know (well, expect, at least) it will eventually become an upturn, so just hang in there. Bottom line: As someone wisely observed about the aging process, it generally beats the alternative!

I should close by noting that the Good Lord knew aging would be tough, so he gave us grandchildren as a balm and comfort to ease the pain. Nothing can ease the pain of aching joints like getting on the floor and playing with a grandbaby. Nothing can rejuvenate a tired spirit so well as the sweet smile and soft voice of someone saying "I love you, PawPaw!"